[rove home] [rove episode guide] [rove transcripts] [rove/pete/corinne/dave pics] ROVE MONOLOGUE EPISODE FOUR Thankyou, I am the man, thank you...welcome to the show...I'm stuffed...whew ! I've been running around like an aeroplane...yes, I've been on the Red Bull all night...thank you very much. Now, let's get right into this baby...Okay, so we can knock it on the head and move on. Now, the referendum is coming up in...er...a long time, but for some reason they thought, lets advertise now and bug the nation while we still can. For those of you who have seen the ads on the television, they're quite odd, and they're really getting to me. Okay now, the "yes" one is playing to the Aussie spirit with the "I am, we are, were all Australians". The "no" voters are trying to win us with the peoples election thing saying "C'mon, as a whole, get behind it and kick it right up the bum outta here!" But, my favourite is the "maybe" ad which is just a small bald man goin' like this...."Eh ???". That's what I'm voting for. Now, they've done a poll of the people around the nation to see how they're gonna vote and at the moment, 40% seem like they're gonna vote yes, 30% seem like they're gonna vote no...20% are thinking of voting yes, but are gonna tell they're mates they're gona vote no, then when they get to the polling booth they are going to vote " yo !" and see what happens...and a staggering 92% are voting that I'm going to be the winner of the best bum Logie at next years Logies. Get my campaign started right now. Now, Democrat Natasha Stott Despoja has come out and said she's looking forward to the referendum because she's looking forward to Australia saying, "Yes ! Yes ! Yes!"...There's no real joke there, I just like the thought of Natasha Stott Despoja saying, "Yes! Yes! Yes!". And a poll has been taken to see who everyone thinks should be the elected head of state should Australia become a Republic...and topping the list at the moment are : Tonia Todman, Alex Papps, Bruce Samazan, and George "the animal" Steele. Which serves them right for asking us as a cast, so there you go... But, the most bizarre poll of all is of course the one where.........oh, I've just drawn a complete blank...I've drawn a complete blank of what my joke was meant to be. I told ya there could be trouble tonight, and it's happened. Do we have a safety net ? No we don't...It's alright, the magic of Red Bull, it's come back *crisis over*, are we alright ? are we over it ?...no-one even cared, but that's alright...I was on my own, we played a trust game...I said, "catch me!"...and everyone just went, "woh ho!". But the way things are looking at the moment, I actually went out and did my own poll, okay ? ...and the way it's turned out, it seems as though 47% of people are saying yes, 48% of people are saying no, and a surprising 5% are saying..."I LIKE ICECREAM !!!"...I don't understand it, lets go chat to the monkeys on the couch [rove home] [rove episode guide] [rove transcripts] [rove/pete/corinne/dave pics] |
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