Judith Lucy - I failed - 29/04/06 @ The Melbourne Town Hall - by epod

Judith Lucy arrived onstage to massive applause from a very enthusiastic audience for her, "I failed", show at the Melbourne Town Hall. Her response? "Careful people, this show could be shit." Thankfully, and predictibly, this was not the case.

This was an afternoon show that had been added due to the original evenings performance being sold out. Judith said that whilst speaking to her manager earlier, he had said that it could be a really quiet show. When she had asked how quiet, he had said, "Um...maybe 17 people." Judith said that if that was the case she would have just taken the audience out for pizza! Infact, her manager had it all wrong as Judith was now also performing to almost another full house!

After viewing the bright, colourful promotional material for her show, I was expecting Judith Lucy to be her usual cheerful, happy self (insert sarcasm here), and I was not disappointed. Judith arrived onstage dancing to the Britney Spears track, "Toxic". For the next hour she told us about her time in radio, her sacking, her new man, Johnny Howard, panic attacks, and also a rather unfortunate medical procedure that she had to endure.

Aside from having to listen to Britney Spears multiple times, one of the other things Judith had to endure during her time in radio, was to subject herself to a Las Vegas Wax. She explained that this was a wax using a stencil of something over the hairs in the genital area. Judith said that she chose a heart, which apparently is something very popular on Valentines Day. She was rather concerned that the wax would not have the desired effect though, as she already suffers from baldness down there.

Judith was unsure as to why it was called a Las Vegas wax, but figured that maybe it was because it involved hot wax and genitals, and therefore, it was "a bit of a gamble". As expected, after it was completed, it didn't look overly appealing. How it looked was best described by her partner, who said this after Judith asked him what he thought, "It looks like some animal has been trapped in your vagina and is trying to get out."

Judith's descriptions of the management of the radio station, and the various nicknames she gave them were very amusing, as was the swipe she took at Kyle Sandilands. During her time in radio, Judith was informed that she had lost the station 100 000 listeners. Quite an achievement I think.

Mid-way through the show, Judith asked the audience if they had any questions. One of the audience asked if she was able to tell the management personally what she really thought after she had been sacked. Judith said that no she didn't, and this is what she was doing this show for. If anything, I think that this show has been good therapy for her!

At the conclusion of the show, Judith sung a song about John Howard, with a backdrop of a huge inflatable poo. Judith said that on the way out, we would all be handed a flag with John Howard on it, and what we needed to do with that flag was to find a piece of dog poo and then stick it into it. I am yet to see a piece of dog poo in my travels, but will hold onto my flag until I find an appropriate place to put it.

I am a huge fan of Judith Lucy's work and recommend anyone who hasn't already seen this show to check it out.


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