Gretel Killen somehow manages to juggle her responsibilities as a busy mum to Zeke, 12, and Eppie, 10, with her high-profile role as host of Network Ten's hit show Big Brother. The glamorous presenter was married for five and a half years and has been "deliriously single" for the past eight years.

The first thing to acknowledge is that I'm single - and having read "The Rules for Marriage", I know why, because I definitely couldn't live like this! While I think these rules could maintain a marriage, I certainly don't believe they encourage love or mutual respect. Ultimately these rules would make only the male happy, to the savage detriment of the wife. Regarding the lowering of expectations, I don't approve of this. But if that means fantasy meeting reality in order to make a marriage survive then I guess that's the individual's decision.

As far as maintaining your looks goes - I don't think anybody would be happy if they let themselves go. It's not so much about respect for your partner, it's logical. If you're in a relationship, why not keep yourself precious and desirable just as you would do if you were single? Essentially, it's about being proud of yourself, and not someone else. Also, I don't believe it's wrong for a woman to juggle work and children. It's admirable and very hard but it can take its toll on a relationship.

Furthermore, I don't think that women should tailor their sex drives to suit their husbands although I'm sure they do. However, a shared sexual relationship helps keep the love relationship alive and that's the responsibility of both partners. If you have unequal sex drives you should both work towards a mutual resolution - it's not just the woman's problem. And this idea that a wife should turn a blind eye to her husband's porn is just so patronising! The narrow-minded definition that writers that writers have of modern women is so old fashioned. Women also enjoy sex toys and porn!

Basically, this book's outlook is very dated and doesn't respect the uniqueness and strength of being a woman. It suggests absolutely suffocating yourself. It says we play the game and suppress negative feelings, but if so, who are we attracting? A woman who follows "The Rules for Marriage" has to ask herself : "If this is the bait on my hook, what sort of fish am I attracting?"

One of the most important things about this book is that it concentrates on the woman surrendering her needs to keep a man happy, and then making the most of the fact that at least she's still got a marriage. But in terms of self-fulfilment, this book is only relevant if your only goal is to be married. If your goal is to be with a challenging partner and have an inspiring relationship, then "The Rules for Marriage" isn't for you.